Why I Didn't Touch My Soldering Torch for a Year

The beginner mistake that (almost) sabotaged my jewelry journey

If you're learning soldering for the first time and your torch is still sitting in its box... trust me, you're not the only one.

People often assume I've always been confident around a soldering torch because I've been teaching jewelry making for so many years. Ha! If only they knew.

The truth is, I was absolutely terrified of the thing.

In fact, after I bought my very first torch... It sat there collecting dust for almost an entire year…All until one simple shift finally gave me the confidence to use it.

After finishing my Graduate Gemologist qualification in Armonk, Westchester, I finally decided it was time to stop talking about becoming a jeweler and actually do something about it.

I'd made the decision about a year earlier while I was living in Manila, but life had a habit of getting in the way. Once we moved to New York though, I thought, "Right. No more excuses."

So naturally, I did what every aspiring jeweler does... I went a little overboard buying tools.

I asked for an apprentice tool kit from Rio Grande for Christmas, bought myself a Smith Silversmith torch, a gas bottle, and everything else I thought a "proper jeweler" should own. The lovely folks at the welding supply company connected everything up for me, showed me how it all worked, and sent me on my merry way feeling very official.

I carried all my shiny new treasures down into the basement, carefully set up my little workshop, stood back to admire it all… and thought, "Well now I actually have to use this thing."

Suddenly, owning a torch and lighting a torch felt like two very different achievements.

Every Excuse Under the Sun

Looking back, it's almost funny because I had the perfect setup.

The basement itself was brilliant. It was almost like a self-contained apartment with a pool table, foosball table, an air hockey table, and even a small kitchen.

Most importantly, it had great ventilation (super important for soldering and making jewelry in general).

At the back, I had my little jewelry room, and next door I'd set up a study where I was working through my gemology course.

Honestly, I had everything I needed.

Everything... except the courage to light that torch.

So instead, I found plenty of other things to keep myself busy. I'd organize tools, rearrange my bench, study gemstones, convince myself I was being "productive"... anything that meant I didn't actually have to strike that first flame.

It wasn't one specific thing that frightened me… It was every freeeking thing!

The gas bottle.

The striker.

That horrible popping sound if you hadn't opened the gas enough.

The little puff of black soot that always seemed far more dramatic than it really was.

I wish someone had told me back then that almost every jeweler feels that way at the beginning.

I'd Googled Myself Into a Panic

Looking back, I realize I'd done something I now see students doing all the time.

I'd read soooo much about torch safety that I'd managed to scare myself half to death!

Every article seemed to focus on what could go wrong. I remember reading that you shouldn't use an ordinary lighter because it might explode (thanks Google. As if I wasn't already nervous enough.)

Confession, I didn't even know automatic torch lighters existed…

Years later, I'd walk into professional workshops and watch experienced jewelers casually lighting their torches with cigarette lighters without giving it a second thought.

(I'm still not saying that's safe... capisce?)

At the time, though, I'd convinced myself that simply getting the thing lit was a dangerous operation.

My Own Jewelry Snobbery Didn't Help

I probably didn't help matters by insisting on buying a "proper" torch from the beginning. There was definitely a little bit of jewelry snobbery involved. In my head, real jewelers used big gas torches, so that's what I bought.

It never really crossed my mind that starting with a butane torch might have been a much gentler introduction.

(To be fair, my local community jewelry class also used Smith Silversmith torches, so I genuinely didn't think there was another option!)

Which made one thing very strange...

The Torch Wasn't Actually the Problem

I wasn't frightened of the torch during class.

It was the same torch, same gas, same flame… but for some reason, I wasn’t bricking it every time it came to lighting it?

It took me years to understand why, but eventually I realized what it was…

At college, there was always someone else in the room.

In my mind, if anything were to ever go wrong, the tutor would be the one to deal with it.

I wasn't carrying the responsibility on my own, so my brain was free to concentrate on learning instead of imagining every possible disaster.

At home in my studio, the torch hadn't changed, but the environment had. That turned out to be one of the biggest lessons I learned, and it had absolutely nothing to do with soldering.

Borrowing Someone Else's Confidence

Everything finally clicked after I attended the three-month intensive program at New Approach School for Jewelers.

By the time I came home, I'd spent hundreds of hours soldering under the guidance of an instructor I trusted completely.

Looking back, I don't think New Approach magically gave me confidence.

I think it let me borrow someone else's.

My teacher, Blaine Lewis (*cough cough* name drop), wasn't worried.

None of the instructors were worried… Actually, everyone around me treated soldering like making a cup of tea.

So after a few hundred repetitions, my brain decided...

"Maybe this isn't a life-threatening event after all."

Somewhere along the way, the fear disappeared. So the next time I went down to that studio, I unpacked my torch and hooked everything up without a second thought. I even bought myself a Smith Little Torch like the one we'd used during the course.

Nothing magical had happened.

I certainly hadn't suddenly become fearless.

I'd simply spent enough time borrowing confidence from someone who already had it until, somewhere along the way, it became my own.

So Here's What I Tell Beginners

That's one of the biggest reasons I never laugh when a beginner tells me they're frightened of lighting a torch.

I know exactly how they feel because I was that person.

I had a fully equipped workshop sitting in my basement for almost a year before I found the courage to use it.

So these days, if one of my students tells me they're nervous, I don't tell them to "just be confident." (That's hopeless advice!)

Instead, I tell them to borrow a little confidence.

Ask your partner, your mom, your sister, your neighbor, or even your dog to just come and sit in the workshop with you for a couple of hours.

They don't need to know the first thing about jewelry or soldering. They don’t need to know flux from cornflakes.

They just need to exist in the room while you light the torch a few times.

It's amazing how much calmer your brain becomes when you're not the only living soul in the workshop.

Before long, you'll realize you're not borrowing their confidence anymore.

You've built your own.

Just don’t borrow confidence from the cat.

Cats and soldering stations do not mix.

Happy soldering!

Lucy xx

About The Author

Lucy Walker
Lucy Walker is the Founder of Lucy Walker Jewelry & the Metalsmith Academy, she’s a self-proclaimed crossfit box champ, dog mum, and wearer of a bunch of other hats. With over 17 years in the jewelry industry and 7 years empowering jewelry makers globally, Lucy has created world-class online training designed to take you from absolute beginner to jewelry-making pro! Whether you’re looking to build a business, or create beautiful pieces to wear and share with loved ones, Lucy has created the best community to help you do it.